I want to open a discussion about addiction and addictive behavior. My prayer is that the discussion is in depth, meaningful, and liberating- and that many of you will openly participate in the discussion:)
So let's start with the question, "what is addiction?"
What do you think defines addiction and/or addictive behavior? When does addictive behavior become addiction? Talk to me. Feel free to use the search bar to stir up some ideas.
I have a lot to say on the subject, a whole lot, but I would love for you to start.
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Professional Counselor in a beautiful cage of Nurturing Responsibilities, totally unrelated to my former life... This blog is a dedication to the woman I am inside- The woman I am inside of the things that I do.
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- Anna
- Masters of Marriage and Family Therapy, Super Charged Wife and Multi-tasking Mother of two;>
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My Dear Reader,
It is my absolute pleasure to anonymously engage your counseling quandries. Please understand that while writing is a wonderful way to dialogue it does have its limitations. In addition, while I will be drawing from my formal counseling education, this blog does not serve as a replacement for any kind of medical or therapeutic attention.
Yours Truly,
Anna
It is my absolute pleasure to anonymously engage your counseling quandries. Please understand that while writing is a wonderful way to dialogue it does have its limitations. In addition, while I will be drawing from my formal counseling education, this blog does not serve as a replacement for any kind of medical or therapeutic attention.
Yours Truly,
Anna
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Be Anonymous or Be Yourself :))
8 comments:
Anything that you are completely committed to...usually used in a negative sense.
Whatever you are addicted to, controls you, you do not have control over it.
overstressed unhappiness; a predominate emotional and mental climate that is toxic and unbearable because it is in complete opposition to the natural flow of love and grace and the freedom of wholeness; a vexed climate insobordinate to god's perfect law; a lack of such desired freedom that in the absence of a truly supportive network of healthy functional human beings leaves a situation almost unbearable and to hard to fight the opposing factors case in point- i believe the lord is relocating his people into a closer clan because we are going to have to have the ultimate nourishment and love to sucessfully and abundantly walk homewardbound in these last days- no more divide and conquer!!!!!!! grace grace and more grace- that is what is cultivated when we come together in unity- without it we get too parched and too vulnerable to stand thats when we become unbalanced and fall. so here is to standing and standing firm together
Yes, Addiction has both an environment that it thrives in and a committment that can be destructive to oneself and ones family.
In this vein, I would say that Addiction takes the form of an unhealthy and counterfiet relationship. Relationship in that there is a committment and dependency; counterfiet in that addiction is usually satisfied in the form of a thing or activity.
I do believe people can be the object of addiction, but this too usually comes in the form of a certian unhealthy "thing" in the relationship that perpetuates the addictive relationship. Whatever it is, control and manipulation are inevitable red flags of addictive relationships- not at all based on truly sacrificial love that incubates a nourishing relationship.
I would add that addiction, taking the form of a relationship, replaces normal, healthy, and nurturing relationships. Hence, the environment in which it thrives is either one where on has isolated oneself because of the addictive relationship or one in which one has been subjected to an unhealthy environment that has a resulting element of isolation.
Many times it is the product of both. Many who struggle with addiciton have never experienced or were unable to gleen from truly nurturing environments and in turn create the only environment they know- one entangled with service to destructive patterns of isolation and independence.
This is a key component I am likely to say more about later. I want to keep the floor open for further comments before I cover any more ground.
Addiction...very interesting topic. It's funny cause I seem to focus that word more on my spouse than myself. I mean my spouse has what you would call an addictive personality. Doesn't matter what it is, he can become totally engrossed in it and doesn't let up until whatever it is has been consumed. But in reality I feel that my addiction is just as bad as his. I guess you could say that I am addicted to having everything be an exact way. If its not I can fall into depression, or become angry, or feel my self worth isn't where its suppose to be. It seems to be a daily struggle. So going back to what the first person said...whatever your addicted to, controls you, you do not have control over it. I would have to agree.
To 9:25 PM-
Certainly- Anger, Depression, and Anxiety are all symptoms of trying to control the uncontrollable.
Honestly, those are symptoms of most any unhealthy ballance in life.
The opposite is also true; Peace, Joy, and Contentment are by-products of a ballanced life. I truly believe this state can only be achieved when we acknowlege that we are indeed not in control and we depend on God to be our true stability. When we completely embrace that God alone defines our worth through Christ, that God alone holds the power of Life and Peace, that God alone has the power to direct and ordain our paths- then we can rest; then we can have freedom from the false gods that control us, i.e., our addictions that offer false promises.
When we arrive at the place of surrender before God, then we can humbly accept the calling that He truly desires- to Love Him and to Love one another. True love can operate only on these principles of surrender, grace for self and others, and trust in the God who teaches us to love more perfectly.
Consider 1 Corinthians 13 in the New Testament:
"And now I will show you the most excellent way.
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails."
I would firmly say that as long as one is controlled by addictive behaviors, one cannot truly love.
I think addiction is a vehicle used to satisfy immediate behaviors. The "feel good" gene that wants quick fixes.
So as a result, you have to constantly feed that craving because when you don't you become anxious, depressed, worried, angry, etc. until you, once again, feed that monster and put it back to sleep.
I think that all these emotions come out of an empty void that people try to fill with hollow pleasures that quickly evaporate because they are not eternal things like hope, faith, and love.
P.s. I enjoy reading all the responses but sometimes it is difficult to undersand. Maybe, I just can't really comprehend well but regardless, is there any way you can re-word your posts in a simpler dynamic?
I really like this discussion.
Signed,
An Addictive Personality
an addiction can be reading books, bitting fingernails, watching TV to escape from the real things that are a little challenging to do. The affore mentioned habits are the ones I have that keep me from doing the big projects that must be done. So I guess that my addiction is procrastination. My tasks seem so daunting I put them off and therefore I watch TV and read books while I bite my fingernails out of nerves because I know I need to be doing other things.
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